How the 12 Signs of the Zodiac Troll Online?

Trolling is an online phenomena that became popular after the invention of social media. If you are not sure what a troll is, here is a definition:

Trolls typically hide behind the laptops and its their personal mission to make someone feel bad about themselves.

Generally trolls:

Anyway, somehow trolling and astrology got inside my head and I had a brilliant idea. How the 12 Signs of the Zodiac Troll Online? I thought of the reasons why each sign would do it and how they will defend themselves once they are found out as trolls.

TROLL IS CALLED OUT, THIS IS HOW THEY RESPOND:

Fire Signs:

Aries Troll

Reasons: Anger, angry with the whole world.

Trolling Method: Insults, curses, and threatens violence.

Leos Troll 

Reasons: Insecurity and wants attention.

Trolling Method: Pretends to get offended, gives backhanded compliments and self promotes themselves.

Sagittarius Troll

Reasons: Restless, out of $$$ for drugs and high wore down

Trolling Method: Ramble self righteous nonsense then disappears.

Earth Signs:

Taurus Troll

Reasons: Is broke, fat, and ugly.

Trolling Method: Say something even more vile and then does not say anything.

Virgos Troll 

Reasons: Life feels disorganized, and does not feel perfect

Trolling Method: Know it all, states facts and why you are wrong.

Capricorn Troll

Reasons: Hates career and life, depressed

Trolling Method: Cynical, sarcastic comments and responds, threaten to kill self (means it)

Air Signs:

Gemini Troll

Reasons: Bored, phone died, and has no one to talk to. 

Trolling Method: Offensive, slightly funny, sporadic comebacks

Libra Troll

Reasons: Feeling ugly, unpopular, no boyfriend/girlfriend

Trolling Method: Apologizes, plays nice guy but is very passive aggressive.

Aquarius Troll

Reasons: Social revolution failed, does not feel special

Trolling Method: Comments with God complex and says something random/weird. 

Water Signs:

Cancer Troll 

Reasons: sad, hangry (hungry+angry), paper cut, indigestion

Trolling Method: Complain while trying to get others to like them.

Scorpio Troll

Reasons: Hates life, depress, addicted to drugs

Trolling Method: Scorpios silently lurks then responds with fucked comments (such as Go Kill Yourself).

Pisces Troll

Reasons: Sobriety, reality sets in and delusions crushed

Trolling Method: Lies then tries to make you feel bad when called out. Then plays victims while manipulating others.

 I hope you enjoyed this, btw I promise I am not trolling.